Art of Manliness: Avoiding Learned Helplessness

(Click on the title, and it will link you to the full article on The Art of Manliness website.)

The Art of Manliness recently posted an interesting article about: "Boosting Your Resiliency-Part 2: Avoiding Learned Helplessness and Changing Your Explanatory Style." It seemed like a good idea to revisit some of those passages now that I am homebound and restless in this blizzard.

In 1967, Dr. Martin Seligman began his social experiments focusing on learned helplessness. These experiments (unfortunately) began with three groups of canines, two of which would receive mild shocks to test their capacity for resilience, and their abilities to modify their behaviors in such a way that it would allow them to escape the shocks, while the third was the control group, receiving no shocks at all.

The first group of dogs were given electric shocks, but were able to press a panel with their nose to make the shocks stop. The second group of dogs were given the shocks as well, but had no recourse to make them stop. The third group was the control and received no shocks.

The dogs in the first and third group recovered well from the experiment. But the dogs in the second group, those that had been helpless to stop the pain, developed symptoms similar to clinical depression.

In the second part of the experiment, the dogs were placed in an enclosed box separated by a low barrier over which they could see. When the shocks were administered, all the dogs had the opportunity to easily escape the pain by jumping over the partition, and this is what the dogs in the first and third group did. But the dogs in the second group, those which had previously learned that there was nothing they could do to escape the shocks, simply lay there whimpering and took it. They had come to believe that nothing they did mattered; Dr. Seligman called this behavior “learned helplessness.”

The experiment was repeated with other animals, babies, and adult humans, and the results were the same. Once subjects had been exposed to a situation over which they had no control, they would continue to feel helpless, even in situations where they *did* have control.

Explaining Explanatory Style

Dr. Seligman discovered that the difference between those who were able to bounce back and those who were susceptible to learned helplessness was rooted in the different ways people explain the things that happen to them.

Seligman argues that our interpretation of events can be broken down into three categories:

• Personalization (internal vs. external)
• Pervasiveness (specific vs. universal)
• Permanence: (temporary vs. permanent).

The authors of The Resilience Factor helpfully rename these categories in an easier to remember way and explain their meaning:

• Me/Not Me
• Always/Not Always
• Everything/Not Everything:

“A ‘Me, Always, Everything’ person automatically, reflexively believes that he caused the problem (me), that it is lasting and unchangeable (always), and that it will undermine all aspects of his life (everything). When problems arise, a “Not Me, Not Always, Not Everything person believes that other people or circumstances caused the problem (not me), that it is fleeting and changeable (not always), and that it will not affect much of his life (not everything).”

For obvious reasons, studies have shown that those with a “Not Me, Not Always, Not Everything” explanatory style are the most optimistic, while those with a “Me, Always, Everything” explanatory style are prone to pessimism and depression. Once MAE’s fail at something, they are susceptible to experiencing “learned helplessness” for a long time and across many areas of their life.

The effect of your explanatory style not just on your resiliency but on your whole life cannot be overstated. Those with a pessimistic, “Me, Always, Everything” explanatory style are more prone to depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, and paralyzing inertia in the face of setbacks. Those with an optimistic, Not Me, Not Always, Not Everything style, on the other hand, experience improved health and happiness and significantly more success in the workplace, at school, and on the playing field.

It's tough to be reminded that the way that we think about the world is *not* objective. In reality, it's a series of unconscious or subconscious choices we repeatedly make to affirm our role within the world at large. Sure, it could be incredibly liberating to read about studies such as this, and simply recognize that we are the result of our own unwitting social experiments – individuals that theoretically *could* continue to modify our psychological makeup, our perceptions and related behaviors, into a better life, but... Not being world renowned social scientists ourselves, how do we delve in to our own psychological programming to debug our systems, and embark on a metapersonality upgrade?

Neuropsychiatrist, Dr. Daniel Amen, refers to debunking our learned helplessness by fighting what he termed the "A.N.T.'s," Automatic Negative Thoughts. He believes that if we can consciously train ourselves to question, and therefore nullify, the negative thoughts that surface in that cycle of learned helplessness, then we can often spring ourselves from the confines of our own sabotaging anxiety and depression. (To be noted: Dr. Amen does believe that there are both genetic and environmental roots to anxiety disorders and clinical depression that are very real, and need to be addressed biochemically – so please don't think he went all Tom Cruise on our asses, and is telling us to "turn that frown upside down" in place of the meds that signal relief for the millions suffering with those conditions.)

There is a term in developmental psychology for that subconscious stream of chatter that we hear inside our head – the one that often seems to be the wizard behind the magical curtain in our mind – it is called "the tapes." These "tapes" seem to play on repeating loops, affirming and confirming the ways we perceive the outside world, and our usefulness, productivity and projected success within that scope. Again, the theory stands that if we can derail negative tracks of this looping tape within our mind, we can free ourselves of the tethers which hold us back, or taint our most earnest efforts.

So many different people hitting that same metaphorical nail on the head: "change your mind to change you life." Okay, it sounds easy enough! Stop *believing* that every thought that floats through my head is 'true.' Remember how much my *perceptions* color the 'objectivity' of a given situation or scenario. Be more discerning while reviewing these perceptions, and toss away the negativity that holds me back unsympathetically. Right. I can do that. Or at least try my darnedest.

Theoretically, living without the burden of that crushing self-criticism would free me up to explore all of the adventures I talk myself out of when stuck in the rut of seeing my life as a tally of defeats and screw ups. But... While trying to fight the inertia, the pinching self-critic, the seemingly fatal flaws that keep me feeling immersed within my youthful folly – I wonder: What are the exercises to train myself into being a more fully realized, and organically capable, successful person?

Now that I know what *not to do,* even if I make that into a 'to do' list – what are the social experiments that I can administer to myself in order to craft this new resilient super human? Anyone??? I suppose this very question lays at the foundation for groups like the aforementioned Scientology, and other such organizations claiming to be the key to realize the individual's fullest potential. (Eek!) Can't I just keep a journal, or do some push ups?!?

Two weeks ago I came up with an idea for this blog, a new series called "Dare (Will) to Dream," in which I ask many of my closest friends to dare me into having a richer life. (It could be amazing, or the most ridiculously lame idea ever fathomed... Maybe I've just watched "Yes Man" too many times on cable.) But after re-reading this Art of Manliness article, maybe it's just what I need to combat the wintertime inertia that has slowed me down, as of late.

I think of my abused pit bull that I rescued years back, desperately needing to be "reprogrammed" after his rough puppyhood. Or my dear 3 legged dog friend Aubrey, who despite his hardships, always seems upbeat and chipper. (So, do I need to sever off one of my own limbs to get a case of the giggles?!? Hopefully not...)

If helplessness can be learned, so can its opposite. I am ready to dare myself into a new perspective for a new resiliency to take root. Go on, dare me – I dare you to...