Friends for Life

It's good that I have the friends I do – they keep me grounded. Whether it is my friend Cayli who is my reality check, and keeps reminding me that I am "normal" for feeling nervous about first dates, and finding love, since we all do... Or my friend Jen, who patiently runs the play by play of every interaction I've ever had, and then dissects it perfectly for me. Or my friend Sarah, from high school, who commiserates with me about her own dating experiences, and tells me what works or doesn't work with the men she meets. Or my Canadian artist friend Mia who said: "It's too bad that same sex marriage isn't recognized in DC, or you could marry me so I could get my Green Card."

(((Ha! There are so many things to comment on about that statement. But it all boils down to: Legally I am a guy, and she is a woman, so pretty much anywhere would be fine to get married, (unless there is still some homo-a-gogo action on the island of Lesbos, where men are forbidden, and heterosexuality punishable by death ~ than I think I'm good, thanks!) Plus, I saw that movie (Green Card) and it didn't end well. I mean, their scheme didn't work (Monticello...), not even commenting on the film's snooze-fest plot.)))

It was funny though, having so many friends talk me through what is so ridiculously routine for millions of other people. I've dated tons of people in the past, had first dates, relationships, the whole nine yards. It's just funny now to have my perspective tweaked at the same time my persona has also changed. Not only do I *think* differently, but I am also received differently, in part because of the change in my thinking and approach, but also in my appearance. Double whammy. So, I can't tell you how helpful it is to have these friends talk me down when I start to get too wound up in the minutia of it all.

Some of these friends have known me for over a decade, while others have known me for just a year. But in all cases, everyone tells me the objective truth about the changes they witness during my constant evolution. Things ranging from my self confidence slowly resurfacing (almost erring on cockiness), to the worrisome, over-analytical side dissipating when the testosterone levels are on the rise. {I am drafting another post to explain more about the direct relation of my T levels to my personality. More about that soon.}

Everyone keeps me in check by their no bullshit updates. More often than not, their running commentaries are not just obligatory twittering. Nope. These mo'fo's really lay it on me, calling me out when I let things get too out of whack in one direction or another. Not that I am doing the perfect job of striking the fine balance quite yet, but I feel really grateful to have these alliances with people who are rooting for me, and are willing to be honest to help me help myself. (What does the rest of the world do when they don't have their gaggle of gals telling them how to be a better man? No, really?!?)

Thanks, friends, for your assistance in helping me choose an outfit, for your guidance when I am about to make a wrong turn down Lover's Lane, and for your candor in kicking my ass when I really need it. I hope to make you all proud but putting all of your well thought out advice to good use. I'm trying! Stick with me, it's just gettin' good!