Mama's Boy

My best friend told me about a funny conversation she had with her mother the other day. Her Mom basically said: "Of course you think you are the most special girl in the world. Your father raised you to think that... And of course you might have a tough time finding a partner who can treat you as well as you believe you deserve to be treated, under those circumstances. You believed that just because you are cute and funny that everyone would be lining up to date you, and feel lucky if they had the chance." (Or something to that effect.)

It was a wake up call to my best friend.

And it dawned on me that I had the reverse situation. My father was ever-ready to knock me down off of my imaginary pedestal, but my mother did genuinely believe that I was a good kid, deserving of all of the chances that she never had in life. She is a care-taker extraordinaire – she is a cancer -astrologically speaking-, an elementary school teacher, mother of two, and an all around bleeding heart do-gooder.

Don't get me wrong, there are no little chirpy birdies fluttering around her as if she was Snow White. An ex of mine once remarked: "Your Mom is this really tough but sweet woman. She'd have your back in a knife fight, and would bake you your favorite muffins the next morning." And it's true.

(As a small child, I remember my mother in her orange terrycloth night gown literally throwing herself up against our back door, as some creepy burglar tried to break in and steal her purse sitting on the kitchen table. She braced herself against the door and yelled repeatedly: "YOU'RE NOT GETTING IN HERE!!!" And he didn't. Go Mom!)

My Mom did everything she could to help ease my anxiety from being too sensitive in a world that can be very abrasive. All in all, I know that she loves me and really does want the best for me, even when we disagree. (Like her resistance to my transition, yet the other day she called me her son for the first time ever. It was incredible!) But I wonder if I have been spoiled in that way that my best friend is now contemplating about her own upbringing.

Seriously, will I ever find a prospective partner that will have my back in a knife fight AND bake me my favorite muffins the next morning? I mean, aren't we all just looking for that?